Ego is the Enemy … putting the greater good above your own vanity … the best ideas from Ryan Holiday’s book
August 8, 2022
I first met Ryan Holiday 4 years ago.
We were speaking together at a marketing conference in Istanbul. As host of the event, I was organising the two days, working with all the different speakers, and keeping the audience upbeat and engaged.
First up was Ryan Holiday. I eventually found him sat in a far corner of the conference centre, jeans and checked shirt, his head deep into a book. With a yellow highlighter pen he worked through the pages of a historical biography, deep in his own world. “Yeah, I’m Ryan” he acknowledged. Having done the introductions, he quickly wanted to tell me about his great love – his herd of cattle which is rears in Texas. Cattle farming was clearly his main job. Books, business and speaking were more of a passionate hobby.
On stage he was equally without ego. None of the typical extroverted showmanship of many speakers, often seeking to compensate with entertainment for their limited thought. Ryan was clearly a deep thinker, and as he talked about his philosophy for marketing – for brands, business, leaders – he stood almost motionless and monotone. But his thoughts were profound.
He has been described as “a young, smart, marketing powerhouse turned motivational speaker who has attracted fans from every imaginable discipline.”
As an author “when it comes to motivation, Holiday makes readers take stock of their lives and careers through the timeless lens of an ancient philosophy, stoicism.”
At 21 years old Holiday was marketing director of American Apparel. After dropping out of college at 19 to apprentice under the strategist Robert Greene (The 48 Laws of Power), he went on to advise many bestselling authors and multi-platinum musicians. His first book, Trust Me, I’m Lying: Confessions of a Media Manipulator, a tell-all expose of modern online journalism, is a Wall Street Journal bestseller and an Amazon Editor’s Best Book of the Month. The Financial Times called it an “astonishing, disturbing book.”
In The Daily Stoic he distills the ancient wisdom of the stoic philosophers into 366 practical meditations, each meant to enrich and enliven our daily lives—at work, on the field, and in our relationships. In The Obstacle Is the Way, he shows us how to turn even the most insurmountable obstacles into advantages, inspired by an ageless set of philosophical principles used by icons from John D. Rockefeller to Amelia Earhart, Richard Wright to Steve Jobs.
In Ego Is the Enemy—an instant Wall Street Journal, USA Today, and international bestseller—he explains how “the battle against ego must be fought on many fronts,” and provides helpful examples of major figures who’ve achieved success by escewing the spotlight and putting the greater good above their own vanity.
Forbes calls it “an inspiring read for anyone faced with adversity” that can “save years of future angst.” Publishers Weekly argues that “Holiday’s performance is commanding and optimistic, sure to inspire readers to take new perspective on their apparent obstacles.” It has so far been translated into over 20 languages (mine is in 35 languages!) and has sold over 230,000 copies.
Tattooed on Ryan’s arm, I noticed, are the words EGO IS THE ENEMY.
Here, he introduces the book:
Here are some of the key ideas:
Your worst enemy lives in you. “Wherever you are, whatever you’re doing, your worst enemy already lives inside you: your ego.” Since pride is in us, it is either we feed it or starve it. How you deal with your pride makes the big difference.
“Your ego is not some power you’re forced to satiate at every turn. It can be managed. It can be directed.” As soon as you feel you are becoming egoistic, boastful, and proud – you can tell yourself to stop.
Pride tells you to talk, humility tells you to listen. Ego encourages you to lift yourself and base your worth on nothing or false worth. On the other hand, humility tells you how important it is to listen to people.
Become a student. Ego tells you not to listen to anyone. As a result, you stop learning. When you become a student, you lay aside your pride. You admit to yourself that you don’t know everything. So, if you want to keep on learning, learn to be humble first.
Ego focuses on self. Humility focuses on others. If you want to become great, you need to help other people become great. That’s just how the universal law works.
Don’t be afraid to take the low position. Ego drives you to make certain decisions just to please others, causing a lot of problems along the way. Do what other people refuse to do simply because they think they are too important to do it themselves.
Ego sways us from our ultimate goal. “We’re never happy with what we have, we want what others have too. We start out knowing what is important to us, but once we’ve achieved it, we lose sight of our priorities. Ego sways us, & can ruin us.”
Ego is the wicked sister of success & failure When you succeed, don’t give in to the temptation of feeling important. Don’t think that you are better than others just because you have succeeded. When you fail, don’t feel like you have been cheated or u have been sabotaged.
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